Tuesday Beat: Boyz II Men - Dreams / 4 Seasons of Loneliness

Dreams


4 Seasons of Loneliness

Reflecting on Lent - Palm Sunday edition

As with service we shall start with the good.

One of my earliest memories is of me in church with my mother. Before she married my dad and before my sister was born. I was 2 or 3. We got to bring branches into church and sang a song that I hope to one day teach my children.

Palm Sunday has always been my favorite Sunday of the year because it leads up to the Christian New Year (Easter). Holy week for me is about really sitting down and examining where you are spiritually. This self examination is a lot harder for me than my usual New Year's review. Come Good Friday I take all my failings and lay them at the foot of the cross, thus I start the year anew and revived.

This Lenten season was a little harder than the other years. I gave up alcohol [no problem - even though I ended up at more open bars than I care to count] and self service. Self service was almost my undoing. I am now at 6 weeks [I started a week before Lent], though I almost caved in during week 2. Working out 3 days a week has helped with energy control. Spending time just talking to God has helped me to control thoughts a little better. I also spent time de-cluttering my life, pruning back the less productive vines and carefully tending to the rest. I want good qi flowing through my life.

When I get through this Lenten season, I feel that I will be a better person than when I started it. I am certainly a lot more disciplined.

Weekly Rundown

2 years of blogging and 300 posts later we find ourselves here.

• First up the librarian. I stopped by as planned and got a big ass grin from her when I walked through the door but there was a patron who would not leave. I went to another section to pick up a book to buy time (I have the digital version of it but shhh). By the time she was free I was in danger of being late for work but it was worth it. We chatted briefly and I finally asked her what her name was (7 weeks later). No I'd never asked. I told her mine and got this really cute smile out of her. Turns out she has wondered which name I go by since I have all my names on my ID. I know I sound like a sixteen year old, but I can help it.
• The job search continues, had a really good interview and am on to round 2. Evolving recommended that I check out the east coast for jobs with H-1 sponsorship opportunities so we'll see what we can find. It's been Business Continuity Awareness week and I've made some contacts in the field who work abroad and they've been great about sharing resources.
• The apple of my eye continues to grow and discover things. My sister got a new phone with a better speaker phone so my niece and I "chat" more often. I talk she listens then she makes baby noises and I listen. We can do this for a good 5 mins if she's fed and dry.
• Workout's kicking ass. I've had to up the intensity a bit because I am feeling extra frisky and there is still a whole week of Lent left. I walked 8.4 miles in 2h 23min on Tuesday which is roughly 3.5mph. That is a personal best for me.
• I forgot to add this last week. Kudos to Naomi on Skins' season finale last week (t'was my guilty pleasure) for bringing the story of her relationship with Emily [image above] full circle with the speech that made the episode . I quote

I've loved you from the first time I saw you; I think I was 12. It took me ... three years to pluck up the courage to speak to you. I was so scared of the way I felt; you know, loving a girl, that I became a sarcastic bitch just to make it feel normal. I screwed guys to make it go away, but it didn't work. When we got together it scared the sh-t out of me because you were the one person who could ruin my life.

I pushed you away. I made you think things were your fault, but really I was just terrified of pain. I screwed that girl Sophia to kind of spite you for having that hold on me. And I'm a total f--king coward because I got these ... these tickets for us for Goa three months ago.

But I couldn't stand ... I didn't want to be a slave to the way I feel about you. Can you understand? You were trying to punish me back, and it's horrible. It's so horrible because, really, I would die for you. I love you. I love you so much it is killing me.

Have a good weekend folks!

Tuesday Beat: Jill Scott - Golden & Jagged Edge - Lay You Down

Couldn't decide between the 2 so enjoy.
Jill Scott - Golden


Jagged Edge - Lay You Down

Weekly Rundown

Spring is here ... and so is the snow apparently.

• Thanks for all the votes of confidence. I've ordered my books so I shall be stopping by the library on Thursday and we'll see where the conversation takes us.
• I got to see my niece last Sunday -- technology is a beautiful thing. She is growing and the cutest thing ever. My niece got her passport in the mail last week. At 3 months she is following in the family footsteps. My sister was cleared to travel internationally at 1 month and I was at 2 months. Nono has actually been to more states thus far than some people that I've met (DC-VA-MD, PA, OH, OK).
• I got a new piercing this week. This one marks the beginning of my professional life. I've been wanting to do it for a while but didn't have the funding. As luck would have it I met someone in my program who is now an apprentice piercer and they needed test subjects so I got it for free. Did you know that nipple piercings are the most painful? Turns out they hurt more than that those "South of the Mason Dixon Line of your pants".
• 5 weeks into the workout program and we are still going strong. I've fallen off the bandwagon a couple of times but it's all good. I am beginning to see hints of definition. To get my piercing I had to take my shirt off and I must say I was not embarrassed to do it. I've never been prouder of my abs in training. Tomorrow we kick off stage 3 of the regimen and switch things up again. Did I mention that this idea of eating 6 times a day is crazy but effective. Like clockwork my body requires food every 3 hours.
• The week got off to a rocky start. I received 3 rejection letters on Monday ... all before lunch. The day itself ended well as I made the conscious decision to not become depressed by the job rejection emails. I'd only done one round of interviews for them all so it wasn't as bad a rejection. Going 3 rounds and then being rejected ... now that hurts. To my fellow job hunters I say stay strong, it only takes one yes for it all to be worth it.

Salut.

Crushing on a librarian

I am soo crushing on a librarian right now. I go to the library every other week on the same day at the same time before work because I know she's in. My guess is she's either straight and well read or totally gay. I've been reading Sarah Waters' books (Tipping the Velvet, Fingersmith etc) and she has read em too so we usually have a mini discussion before I take my stuff and leave.

Today I had a problem with my patron record (couldn't renew books) so we chatted for a minute while she worked on it. I wished her a good spring break and said I'd see her after it or during is she was around. She said she'd be around so you know that means I'm requesting books over the weekend so that they are delivered on Wednesday with a Thursday pickup. I'm sure at this point she knows that I get my stuff on Thurs on purpose.

I recall with great sadness the times before I came out. I was a library assistant back then and there was a patron who came in like clockwork. When my schedule changed she also started coming in on the new days that I worked. We would chat about this and that while I got her stuff. We both loved foreign language films so we were always trading titles. Sometimes she'd jus stop by to chat. I now kick myself for not inviting her out to coffee or something cause she really was a cool chick.

Tuesday Beat: Goapele - Closer

This is my song in the morning while I'm getting ready for work. Who would not be inspired by "I'm going higher and higher, closer to my dreams."

Weekly Rundown

Salut good people.

• My my how time has flown. Can you believe we are already halfway through March? I am staring down 27 ... hard.
• I get to see my niece for a short while tomorrow. I can't wait! The weather had better not result in any delayed or cancelled flights.
• Ever come across a job description that made you say YES! I did this morning. 4 page pdf of job description, requirements etc. I read page 1 and thought this is good. By the time I got to the bottom of page 2 I had halfway composed my cover letter mentally. Come page 3 I was mentally tweaking the finished cover letter and my resume. I mean I am seeing a strong direct correlation between my skills and past experiences and their requirements. I hit page 4 and SCREECH! I see the following "*This Position Does Not Attract International Terms And Conditions". The kiss of death for any foreign national. O well, guess it's back to the drawing board.
• I made a few good contacts this week at a conference. They had lots of good advice on the job search process. I will be on this year's FY 2011 H-1B approved list. (I'm putting it out into the universe.)
• We are that much closer to Spring and the hell it brings those of us with allergies. Don't get me wrong, I love warm weather and the trees greening up. I just hate being in a medical haze every couple of days.
• Evolving asked me whether my current workout schedule was Lent inspired. In a word Yes. I do try to take up something every Lent in addition to giving up something. I blaspheme not when I say exercise can bring you closer to God. Don't believe me, try holding the plank position for extended periods of time. I also needed a healthy way to burn off all the extra energy that comes from giving up self service.
• An early Happy St Patrick's day. I, for one, am looking forward to preparing and eating a full Irish breakfast on said day. I may not be the best cook in the world but I do know breakfast. It is my favorite meal to prepare after all.

Geek post: The floppy disk is mightier than the USB thumb drive

Yes I said it! Geek speak follows so you have been warned. I have a 2 floppy disks (Win98SE boot disk and WinXP boot disk) that I would be lost without. I am a tech support person and they are part of my arsenal. Yesterday I simulated a meltdown of my hard drive and had to erase one of my spares and bring it back up to full functionality. Why? Because I am in disaster recovery / continuity planning and like to make sure that I am prepared. I wrote a blurb on Personal Computer Recovery here which you can take a peek at.

For those who are wondering why no CD usage is mentioned, I wanted to test a USB recovery scenario. If I hadn't I'd have been done in 5 hours tops (that's how long it took me last summer).

The test took me almost 12 hours to complete which is wayyyy too long. 6 of those hours were me trying to figure out why my laptop couldn't see the USB drives (I used an external Maxtor backup and a stick) and where the back-up sticks were. Turns out the Kingston thumb drive was not boot friendly, something I did not find out til after the test. At hour 8 I switched tactics and broke out the floppies. 30 mins later I had wiped clean the corrupted disk and reformatted it. I broke out the backup thumb drive and fired up the laptop, reset boot sequence so that the stick was seen first and the external Maxtor seen second. I use Macrium Reflect to create backup system images and it can be booted off of a CD or USB (if you use a minor ISO hack). I went USB.

What took me the longest time once I got going was the reimaging from the external drive since I was using the laptop with USB 1.0 not USB 2.0.

All in all an excellent test with lots of lessons learned, #1 of which is thou shalt use a USB stick that your machine agrees to boot off of. Can wait to try it again over the summer.

I'll post the weekly rundown over the weekend.

Tuesday Beat: Brandy - Fear of Flying

Today's selection comes with a music history lesson. The instrumental used for this song has been passed down for a few years. The piano instrumental was originally done by Ryuichi Sakamoto and is called Forbidden Colors. It is a beautiful and haunting piece. Hikaru Utada, brought it into the pop realm with her song FYI. Why do I know this? I happen to listen to some of her music.
Alexandra Burke tried her hand at this song, but I think thus far Brandy has done it justice in the US.
Forgive the video for its crap. Just listen to the song.

Weekly Rundown

• Aaah the joys of going out and finding a full time job as a foreign national. I have been working the job search line of business over the past 2 weeks. I am talking networking events, job fairs / hiring events, craigslist (don't knock it - I get freelance work off of it), [IT ares] camps. Name it if I could fit it into my calendar, I made it out there. I am a lot more motivated right now so I'm riding the wave and creating waves of my own.
• It's been 3 weeks now and I've managed to stick to my workout schedule. My goal is to up the muscle (tone up) and trim a bit of the body fat. Granted I am already on the lighter side of the spectrum so I'm not so much worried about the body fat portion of the program. It's the adding muscle and keeping it that is giving me grief. Come summer I want a body that women will hate me for having at the beach because trust me, I will flaunt it. I am working out at home (or the beach) as I decided to go the more natural route and use bodyweight & regular food. Side note: I still can't do a proper push up which is disconcerting - I can finally do the knee cheat one properly though.
• I get to see my niece next Sunday and I'm ecstatic. She is getting cutter by the day and looks more like her mom. Incidentally, I'm reliably informed that she looks like me when she frowns or goes into full baby giggle mode. She will break many a heart.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

Tuesday Beat: Luther Vandross - Can Heaven Wait

Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.

- Anon.