The questions people ask

I drafted this post back in January. I read a post by Alix and decided to publish it.

Why o why do people ask the darnedest questions?

I went out with a bunch of folks to celebrate a friend's promotion. We chose to go to a bar since it was after work and no one felt like shelling out a small mint for a proper restaurant downtown. Needless to say after a few pitchers had circulated the conversation down my end of the table turned to women [I was after all sitting with 3 guys - 2 of whom I knew].

Anyway as we are joking around guy#3 pulls the 'I don't mean to to be rude but are you gay?' speech. G1 damn near pulled a cheek muscle trying not to laugh. I say yea and go back to the conversation since we were "philosophizing" on Victoria's Secrets with the other 2 guys.

A while later g3 hits me with 'So do you date guys as well?' which I pretend not to hear. The conversation is flowing and we are having a great time when I hear 'So are you the man in the relationship?'. Evidently I was more sober than I thought because I did not read him the riot act. I said no and pointedly turned from this guy to talk to the other 2 guys. He got the hint and finally shut up.

Why do people feel that they have the right to ask those questions? Or any other questions that pertain to my sexuality for that matter. Having it come up over the course of a conversation is one thing but interjecting the question is just plain rude. I don't go around asking you if you're the top or the bottom in your relationship.

Now this is by no means the first time that the question has been asked of me. Even my sister asked at one point. Yes I have a more masculine presentation but that's just the wrapper people. I cook and bake with the same amount of zeal that I have when I am tinkering with a car or fixing a running toilet. 

For me it's about finding the balance that works for my mate and I. She might want the occasional bug squashed [though I do try to let them live by taking em outside] and I might need someone with more brains than I have to figure out why the toilet is still running. So even though my masculine self tends to precede my feminine self, odds are usually pretty good that the woman I am dating has as much masculine energy but simply chooses to present it with a different wrapper.

image taken from http://khushi.wordpress.com/2008/07/30/baffled/